I'm a little bit angry at the universe for this moment in time, although if I look back then really the only person I have to blame is myself, yet the limitations of myself I can blame on the universe, on God... right? I didn't pace myself. Then again, others can work as hard as I do and never seem to get tired. Why is that?
Let me reinterpret this. There are some people that God needs to work in a lab and read books and that is their purpose. My purpose is more circumspect, and so every once in a while God must ignite in me the need to go out into the world, to reflect and learn first-hand about his beautiful world, and the beautiful creatures he made.
But was this really the way to do it? To make me so disorganized during the semester that my grades are sliding, my position in my lab is in huge jeopardy, and I feel like I've lost control of myself? Did God have to be so adamant about me spending a summer away that he had to ruin this past year?
Even so it seems I'm back on the track of working over the summer, except that I've missed all the deadlines for summer funding. Because, you know, I'm about as organized as a hedgehog at this point.
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